Priorites

Just when I thought I had my priorities straight this exhibit comes to my school all about genocide in Rwanda, Congo and Bosnia. I'm sitting in the room reading about how shitty meat is for you and all this other stuff, thinking "man I'm gonna get healthy. I'm not gonna eat meat or dairy" and blah blah. Then I go to this exhibit and it just changed my whole my mind. I mean food in amerika is processed, bullshitted, and fed to the masses, but how important is that, really, when girls in Rwanda are being raped and infected with HIV? when thousands of kids in the Congo are orphaned daily?

Yeah its really important to eat healthy. But how important is it compared to genocide? So what if I'm healthy if my life isn't contributing to helping these people live; helping people survive the legalized murder of their family, the rape of their children, and the theft of their humanity.

I'm REALLY having a conflict of priorites. I went to dinner after reading some of this book called "Skinny Bitch", (its all about food thats good for you or not good for you) and going to the art exhibit. I was torn between wanting to eat healthy, and not caring because the girls who got raped in Rwanda haven't eaten in days, and the little kids in Bosnia are hella hungry while I'm rejecting america's processed, growth hormone induced meats. Where's the justice?

So after I came from the exhibit I see all these people walking around with their heads up their asses, and I'm just like how do you justify that? How do you sleep at night in with a thousand dollars worth of shoes in your closet, and not give anything to someone less fortunate? How is it okay to take everything we are given for granted? How can I go back to normal after seeing that? How can I just go back to my $10,000 dorm, at my $45,000 school, get on my $1,000 laptop while texting on my hundred dollar phone and not feel guilty as shit? I do. I feel so ashamed to be using all of this while being encouraged to turn my head and pretend like I don't see SHIT. Just act like I didn't see it. Soon as I leave the building its like it never happens. How do you go back to laughing and joking about someone being fat, skinny, dark, even a hoe? Those girls were gang raped by militiamen. GANG RAPED. Cast out by the family they had left and we have the nerve to label each other bitches and hoes.

I just have so much to think about now. I feel like I'm the only one ever affected so deeply about these things. And as black people especially, how can you see that and still complain about what you don't have due to "the government", or "the man"? Africa is YOUR country. Those are your people, that child is YOU. You can't tell me you have it worse off than those kids.....I guess its true that we as amerikans see things through the glass on the TV, and say "oh thats terrible" then just change the channel.