Since I'm out of school now [whoo!!], I have all this free time to research and waste time. I decided to research something that was actually worth my time! As I said I looked up the info about binding and numero uno: I found a way to bind well enough for me right now. I think it was on ftmguide.org. Basically took some old spandex bike shorts and cut a hole in the seat then put em on upside down. It worked to an extent. Under a small t-shirt [like the ones I wear on a regular basis] it looks like a regular sports bra, but I put a thermal T over it and it looked great! So that was almost the highlight of my day. I probably won't use that now that its summer because I would have to layer too much. As soon as I did it, I realized how much I actually like my breasts so I'll wait on getting a real binder.
So I kept researching and learned about packers and stp's. Also something I think I'll try, just not now. Then I started watching videos on youtube about ftm's and stp's [crazy o.c. with the acronyms lol]. And the best thing happened. I actually thought in my head about the guy in the video as a guy. In my head I used the pronoun 'he', before the video even started. It felt good to think that without having to think about it. It was like no part of me wanted to call him 'her'.
Next video I watched wasn't exactly about stp's and binding, it was more of a vlog. But the guy was talking about his transition from lesbianism to manhood. It was pretty interesting because he talked about his own struggle to accept his masculinity. I'm not considering transitioning myself, right now, but if you just look at everything they have to go through you'd probably reconsider whining about how hard it is to be black, young, or a woman. There's always a minority. The things we think are so important are so small in the scope of the universe. People in other countries are killed for even thinking about, maybe liking someone of their same sex. We've come so far from that. I'm not saying we should settle and stop the fight here, but we should definitely learn to appreciate what we already have.
Now when I say appreciate what we have I don't mean appreciate bits and pieces of it. I mean appreciate the s4s, f4f, ftm, mtf, queer, bi, fag, hag,stag, and every other little category you choose to identify with. If you're not going to accept s4s you may as well not accept the lgbtq community at all.
I don't know how many people know it but s4s are actually necessary for a successful lgbtq society. A society isn't complete without the presence of social deviance [mainly s4s, in the lesbian community]. Social deviance is the violation of social norms such as stereotypical stud-femme relationships. Its hard to define social deviance because ,as we see on downelink, not everyone agrees what is or is not deviant behavior. Some think s4s is wrong, some don't.
The proof that s4s is indeed a form of social deviance is the community's reaction to it. All societies have ways to promote order, stability, and predictability. Ways the community tries to control the deviant behavior is through social sanctions such as ridicule, criticism or gossip. These are innate ways the community as a whole tries to curb the social deviance.
The deviant behavior can become an accepted part of the society. Every sub-society has to make its way to become a part of the bigger society so if you look at it, that's what s4s is doing now. But something else will take its place when everyone else accepts it. Something else has to take the place of socially deviant because that behavior actually builds community, reminds people of something they value, and promotes social change. Deviance clarifies the norms that exist in a society, and with time the society will re-define and adjust those norms to include what was once a deviant behavior.
That's why I don't argue about it. It has to happen for us to move on.
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